Sunday, October 28, 2012

Capture Your Grief {Day 25-28}

Today's post is of course another catch up of the past 4 days, but it will be short. I'm letting the pictures/videos do the talking tonight, well every day except day 28!

If you are just joining me, I have been participating in the Capture Your Grief project hosted by Carly Marie.  October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, so I have been sharing my story for the month of October.

Day 25: Baby Shower/Blessing Cards & Flowers
Today's suggested topic is Baby Shower/Blessing.  I do not like following all the rules so today I'm just sharing a picture of some of the cards and flowers I received after my losses.  Unfortunately, I don't have pictures of all the flowers.
Thanks again to everyone that has sent us cards and flowers over the last two years.  They mean so much to us!

Day 26: Books
Baby Dust by Deanna Roy

Still Standing Online Magazine is a great online resource for everything surrounding infant and pregnancy loss.  I encourage you to check it out!

Day 27:  Artwork
I do not own any artwork, but have several I would love to purchase. So instead of showing you artwork I own I'm sharing a few online stores that have artwork about loss.

Empty by artsieandie on Etsy

We Were Three by The Midnight Orange

You'll Have Heaven Before We Do by Saturday Designs

Day 28: Memory
I don't have a picture to share for today's subject.  Since I have so many memories throughout my journey the past two years, I struggled deciding on which one to share. I've already shared several during the past month, but there are so many more memories and stories.

One of my first memories was during my 2nd miscarriage.  We thought it was going well until the 8 week ultrasound.  B was able to get off work to join me at the appointment.  The tech was quiet so I immediately knew it was bad news.  She told us she would be back, she had to go call the doctor. We still lived in KS at that point and the ultrasounds were done at a separate location from my doctors office.  She came back in and told us the Dr. wanted to see us in his office.  I already knew what the news was but I held it together as we drove over to his office.  He called us into his office and explained all kinds of stuff but basically his point was I would miscarry.  As soon as he left the room I broke down. I was so glad B was there with me for support, he held me in his arms as I cried.

My most recent miscarriage was the total opposite of my 2nd miscarriage.  B has not been able to go to an ultrasound with me since living in AL, so I have become very used to receiving bad news alone.  With my loss earlier this month I was not expecting bad news but I was prepared for bad news. The Dr. walked in the office and I knew as soon as he walked in what he was going to tell me. I guess that is a sign I have been to his office a lot and I know his mannerisms!   After we discussed my options and the next steps for testing he mentioned I handled the news very well, I think he was a little shocked I didn't brake down in front of him like I had the past few times.  I guess I get stronger with each one!

Til' Next Time,


  1. Oh, I am so sorry... miscarriage is just awful. I haven't personally miscarried, but I've had a really hard time getting pregnant, which is probably the hardest thing I've dealt with in my easy life. Hugs!

    1. Thanks. So sorry you are struggling getting pregnant, it is so tough to go month after month hoping and it not happening.

  2. I admire your strength through all of these pregnancies and losses ... and I weep with you during your times of weakness and sorrow! You are a very special Mommy of some precious tiny little ones! I love you! And I am crying!


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